September 3, 2013

Hi to everyone,

Today I woke up early- 6 a.m.- and couldn’t go back to sleep. So, I situated myself in the lounge chair that Mark brought me from home. I asked the nurse for some hot water, dumped in my Starbucks VIA (pretty good stuff, really) and settled down with my “Daily Bread,” my Bible, my coffee and Jesus.

Today was the first time in six weeks that I felt I was really back to having coffee with Jesus. I haven’t had an opportunity to be undisturbed and communicate with Him. I felt alone and searching all the time. If I felt alone, guess who left? I think my time with Him was getting kind of “ho-hum” and God said, “You need to appreciate me more.” I am so very ashamed that it has taken a broken leg and all the pain resulting to make me appreciate my Lord. I don’t really believe that Jesus would put me through all this just so He would receive my appreciation. No way! However, I am convinced the He has used all these occurrences to work for good in my life and in others.

When I think of all the things I have learned and of all the repercussions of a broken leg on the people I have chanced to meet or even the people they have encountered, I have to be amazed at God’s marvelous hand. I’ve been so encouraged by other Christians I’ve met, or by all of you with your e-mails, cards, phone calls, or in-house calls. All these things have worked together to cement and strengthen my faith. The Lord is good. (That is the way one of my friends always ends her texts).

I am truthful when I say I am grateful for this experience. Really, I wouldn’t have missed this time in both the rehab places. Most of it is hard, some is hateful, some is extremely humiliating, but all is good for me. If this hadn’t happened, what would I have done all summer? I would, indeed, have loved to watch my great grandchildren play in the water and the sand. I would have loved being with my family all together. I would have loved to be there for my sister’s family to help them grieve her passing, I might have taken a ride on my ski-doo or gone for a float. Joys for me ,but not really beneficial for anyone else. I think God decided that since I was foolish enough to step in a deep hole, He would use my clumsiness to further my education. He wasn’t through with my usefulness yet, I had more to learn.

My experiences in two rehab facilities are priceless. I’ve had lessons to learn and people to meet. The biggest lesson of all is like St Paul’s. I think I have learned to be content in all situations (Phil. 4:1).

I can’t claim to be there yet. I complained just yesterday about being awakened at 4 in the am to take what the nurse said was a “belly pill”. Not a very satisfactory explanation and I think I am justified in demanding a better one. But still, I did manage to do it in a soft and gentle way. I am just grateful that God thinks I am worthy of working on just a little while longer. He still has something worthwhile for me to do.

I’ve learned so much about being patient, waiting for someone else to do for me. I’ve learned about time. Many things don’t have to be done RIGHT NOW! I’ve met some fantastic lovely people, both Christian and non, who are compassionate and caring individuals. They are hoping to serve good, if not God. I’ve met the owley ones and wondered what made them so crabby. I’ve tried to be cheery and nice and even sympathetic and been rebuffed severely. I’ve seen the truly unfortunate souls who just sit their lives away and then those who choose to be miserable and pass it on to all they meet.

I used to think joy was a choice. Now I’m not so sure. I’ve learned not to be so sure about anything. God knows everything but I know almost nothing. I’ve learned that too. To conclude, I have chosen to find joy in all things as much as I can. Jesus has enabled me to do that. I can greet each day with a glad heart and I can look at this whole episode as a wonderful learning experience. I’ll decide to do that.

I hope all of you are well and that you will have a fall season full of God’s blessings.

Love from Me, Irma Jane Fritz-Zager