August 25, 2013

It’s been a very sad week. My last surviving sibling, my sister Ila Wright, went home to be with the Lord unexpectedly. Oh, how I wish I could be at the memorial services to support the family and say farewell to my beloved sister, but that is not possible. So instead, I wrote the following to honor her life of faithfulness and godliness through many difficult trials.

August 24, 2013

Dear Jill,
I am devastated that I can’t come up there for Ila’s memorial service. I know it is impossible for me to do, but feel badly all the same. I am writing my own tribute to her memory and am sending it to you. I don’t know what kind of service you have planned but sometimes in a more casual memorial service, they ask people to stand and share a word or two. I am sending you mine. I would like to have it read if that is possible. It would please me very much and help me to feel that I was there honoring her as I deeply want to do. My heart is full of tears as I write this because I will miss her so. How I will miss answering the phone and hearing, ,”Hi, It’s Ila.”

How can I put a whole lifetime of memories into a few meaningful sentences? It is impossible but I will try because I want to be there to honor Ila and since I can’t, I must do my best to let you know how much I wish I was with you to say “goodbye” to one of the dearest people I know.
MY heart is crying because of my loss. Ila, I know, Is no longer sad nor does she have tears for anyone. I truly believe she is happily greeting Andy; she is hugging once again her darling child, Jackie, and she is also with my dear mom who we all still miss. There are many other dear loved ones who have graduated to a better life ad they are all there with her giving her love.

I am one of the very few left who has known Ila from childhood on. Over 84 years she has had more than her share of tragedies. She probably considered me to be one of the first. Into her four year old life came this upstart baby to take her place as the baby of the family. Ila never complained about life’s trials but she often complained about the blonde curly haired baby that took her sister Rhea’s attention away. I can still hear her say, “Rhea played with Irma Jane’s hair but wouldn’t touch my stick straight dutch boy bob.

I went on to be annoying all through the teen years. I was there when she didn’t want me to interfere with her friends. I snuck out of house work by hiding in the apple tree. Mom made her read and entertain me when I was bedridden for a year. I wore her clothes and didn’t put them away. I was a horrible nuisance.

She did so many nice things for me as a teen. I was in a car accident and felt disfigured. Ila went to Lansing and bought me a prom dress that was the envy of every girl at Ludington High. Dresses in Ludington then were all alike but Ila found one in Lansing so different and stylish that I felt whole again. It was so special that dress.

Over the years, we’ve all had hard things to overcome. Overcoming the death of a child, raising a handicapped child, caring for an aging mother-in-law, caring for her own mother as she aged, living through the tragedy of her husband’s death by horrible accident; those were the biggest ones. Yet she met each trial with strength and courage.

The Bible tells us to find joy in all things especially in everyday life. Ila did that. She found such joy in the simple things of gardening, preserving, canning, baking the most fabulous bread in the world, caring for the neighbors; all these things she counted as joy. I will miss her so much. We never got to spend enough time together.

Ila was not adventuresome. She was actually a big coward. She pushed me ahead of her up the dark stairway so I would meet the bogeyman first. I had to do everything first to see if it was safe. I got back at her though, when we got older. I pushed her to climb down into the Grand Canyon and then back out. I pushed her on a long hike in Jasper National Park to an alpine meadow. That one scared me and I believed maybe she was right to be scared of some things. In Jasper, We crossed a wide stretch of snow to get to the top of the mountain. Ila was happily exclaiming over the tiny alpine flowers when I heard a thunderous roar. Across the valley I saw a huge cloud of snow erupt into the valley floor. Knowing we had to cross that snow field to get back down, I was scared witless. Ila followed me across that field high-stepping in my tracks as I went as carefully as I could back to solid ground.. I never told her about the avalanche. I was afraid she’d never go with me again. She did though and we traveled to so many places together. She went to China, Italy , Brazil and all over Europe. She loved to travel and loved to get back home.

Later, when traveling days were over we just had fun being together. Now she is the big sister again. Going ahead of me to test the waters of the unknown. This time she didn’t push me ahead of her. She went first. Hers is a graduation celebration. We celebrate her graduation to Glory with Jesus. She now has earned a life with Jesus, free of all sorrow and tears; only the joy of eternal love.

Ila has left behind a legacy of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and faithfulness No one exemplifies the fruits of the Spirit more than she did. She was a good friend, a good neighbor, a good mother, grandma and great grandma. Whatever role she played she did it well.

I will miss her so much. I am crying in my heart today because I should be there with you all to honor Ila’s life. I am with you in spirit though as we together feel blessed beyond measure to have had Ila in our lives.